What is the matter with Fred Thompson?

If Fred Thompson really is trying to become president of the United States, he is the single most inept candidate that any political party has produced in my lifetime. And yes, I am including Lyndon LaRouche.

Thompson, who has set himself apart for his almost complete lack of understanding of relevant political issues, outdid himself on Wednesday. It seems that he cannot remember who controlled the congress during the Supreme Court confirmation hearings of John Roberts.

“The president called me up and asked me to help shepherd judge John Roberts’ nomination through the Senate confirmation process. I was honored that I got that call. I was honored that he thought I had enough friends on the Democratic side that they wouldn't run me out of town!

“We fought hard against each other, but I always thought that we had mutual respect. And that's what it takes.

“Even though the other party controlled the Judiciary committee, we got some votes there. For a good, sound, what I would call conservative justice.”

The Roberts confirmation hearings took place in September, 2005. I remember 2005 because it was only two years ago. One of the things I remember about 2005 is that the Republican Party still controlled both houses of congress, the 2006 elections not having taken place by then. You know, because it wasn't 2006 yet. Because it was still only 2005.

What this means is that Fred Thompson either does not remember:

• which party controlled congress in 2005; or


• which party he belonged to in 2005

I say this because he didn't actually refer to the "Democratic Party," he said the "other party." Maybe he thinks he was a Democrat back then.

Another possibility is that Thompson has a massive gap in his memory and can't remember 2005 at all. After all, he said a few weeks ago that he couldn't offer an opinion about the Terri Schiavo case because he couldn't remember the details. The Shchiavo case was in 2005. Maybe he has blocked out the entire year. Maybe he was drunk the whole time and experienced a blackout.

Whatever it is, I am starting to worry. Unless...

Maybe Fred Thompson is actually a far more brilliant actor than anybody gives him credit for. What if Thompson has made us all players in an elaborate piece of performance art? What if his entire candidacy so far has been an attempt to see how ludicrously inept a man has to be before supposedly rational people will stop and say, "wait a minute..."?

If that's the case, I'm staying. I can't wait to see how it ends.