Republicans link abortion to illegal immigration

Okay, now I'm getting concerned.

At first, admittedly, I took a little too much delight in watching Republicans struggle to comprehend what happened to them on November 7th. I'm not proud of it, but I readily admit that I laughed while I listened to Rush Limbaugh, George Will, Sean Hannity and others try to make the case that the GOP's loss of both houses of congress was, in fact, a victory for conservatives. Sure, it was mean, but it really was ridiculous to hear them argue that because some of the victorious Democrats were more centrist than leftist, it meant the Dems didn't really win on election day. I mean, can you blame me? How can you not laugh at that?

Then, when Ken Mehlman reportedly told GOP operatives that the election results were a mandate for Social Security privatization, I practically choked on my coffee and fell out of my chair. I joked at the time that it meant he was crazy, but I meant it in the hyperbolic sense. Mostly.

Then, the White House announced that it would fight tooth and nail to keep Democrats from giving the government the abilty to negotiate lower prices with drug companies, despite the fact that 75 percent of Americans want them to do just that. I thought, okay, they're really misinterpreting the will of the people on this one. I wrote that they were suffering from a mental illness called "Republicanism," but I was still speaking hyperbolically. Mostly.

Now, though...

Now, I can only conclude in all seriousness that the Republican Party's catastrophic losses on November 7th actually drove some of them crazy, and I don't mean it in the hyperbolic sense. I mean it in the clinical, need-to-be-on-psychotropic-medication-prescribed-by-a-team-of-bearded-pipe-smoking-Austrian-psychiatrists sense.

I don't know how else to say it, so I'll just say it.

A panel of GOP lawmakers in Missouri has issued a report which argues that abortion is responsible for illegal immigration in the United States.

A Republican-led legislative panel claims in a new report on illegal immigration that abortion is partly to blame because it is causing a shortage of American workers.

The report from the state House Special Committee on Immigration Reform also claims "liberal social welfare policies" have discouraged Americans from working and encouraged immigrants to cross the border illegally.

The statements about abortion, welfare policies and a recommendation to abolish income taxes in favor of sales taxes were inserted into the immigration report by the committee chairman, Rep. Ed Emery.

All six Democrats on the panel refused to sign the report. Some of them called the abortion assertion ridiculous and embarrassing.

If you know any Republicans, please, for their own sakes, keep them away from sharp objects.